Five falling leaves

falling
leaves from the tree
released from the centre
returning to the earthen core
gently

i
there is something very poetic
melancholic
about watching leaves fall
at least I thought that until this year
watching leaves fall
in former years
trees
crying leaves
lamenting summer's
passing..
sweating
off last seasons toxins

ii
this year I noticed
I have never seen an individual leaf fall from a tree
let go
die as it were
to this life
this time
like a candle flame which burns out
and the vanish flame
the dying ember
the ending glow
bright yellow
fleeting brightness
pause in time
smoke arising
curling in my nostrils
reassuring familiar
scent of death
kicking through leaves
in the moist times

iii
this year I realised
yes, I'd seem lots of leaves
but not one leaf
and so I looked deeply
at the many for the one
eyes darting
seeing many
missing the individual
picking one at the expense of the others
focus now
lots of others now fall side by side to the one I focus on...
now I become aware of it as an individual
now I realise I am witnessing its death
now I don't want it to fall
now I realise it may never fall
now I wonder what glue holds it
now I wonder at my friend's presence
now I want it to fall
now my eyes are confused by the pattern of the twigs and branches agains the sky
now I know I am the leaf
the leaf is me
we inter-are

iv
mind becomes calm
breathing in I know I am breathing in
breathing out I know I am breathing out
I rise and leave my seat
I wonder if the leaf
was so attached to me
was sad at my leaving
as I at deserting it at this time

v
no I
no it